


A Storm Inside My Head

by Fandom_trash_aus (orphan_account)



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Nightmares, PTSD John, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Sharing a Bed, Storms, Thunderstorms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-08-07 12:05:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7714294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Fandom_trash_aus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's PTSD makes his dreams nightmares, but when thunderstorms crash outside the lines between dreams and reality begin to blur.  The only person who can help wants to take things slow, and John dares not to over step boundaries.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Storm Inside My Head

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for clicking on my story, I hope you enjoy it! This can also be read on Wattpad if you prefer to read on that website, the link is in my profile.

If you were to ask John Watson what he was afraid of, thunderstorms wouldn't even cross his mind.  Being killed, his friends dying, and spiders would be at the top of the list, but not thunderstorms.  To him, thunderstorms are a natural occurrence and shouldn't be something people are afraid of, but something that should be celebrated for their beauty and power.  In fact, whenever these storms begin to brew during the daytime, John pulls a chair up by the window just to watch the rain patter against the window and the lightning illuminate the sky.  It makes him feel at peace, knowing that something this powerful can't harm him as long as he's in the safety of his own home.  However, thunderstorms that appear in the middle of the night are a different story.

A particularly loud crack of thunder echoes through the flat and John sits up straight in bed with a startled gasp.  The nightmare he was in the middle of was one of the most traumatizing yet.  In the dream he was back in Afghanistan amid a hail of gunfire, his comrades dying in the trenches right before his eyes.  Patrick, one of the men he had befriended, crouched beside him frozen, fear rendering him unable to fire his weapon.  Truth be told Patrick was barely even a man, he had only turned eighteen a couple months ago.  After John had given him a short motivational speech Patrick felt ready to return fire.  The young boy stood up and fired his weapon once before a bullet ripped through his left eye socket.  Patrick fell to the ground, his dark crimson blood staining his blonde hair.  John held him in his arms as he died, trying his best to remain strong for the young boy. 

The worst part about this nightmare is that it actually happened.  Patrick died in pain, and John had to be the one to tell his mother that her son was dead.  John sighs heavily, distraught from the painful memory.  He lays back down on the bed and puts both hands over his eyes while trying to control his breathing. 

"Doctor Watson." A shaky voice says from the other side of the room.

John swallow thickly and shakes his head.  "Get out of my head.  It's enough that I see you in dreams, I don't need to see you in the real world too." He replies firmly.

"You did this to me." The voice immediately shoots back.  "You're the one who convinced me to get back up and keep fighting."

"I know that!" John shouts, finally opening his eyes to face his hallucination of Patrick.  The boy looks exactly the same as the moment before he died.  Blood and dirt staining his body, and the left side of his face shredded by the bullet.  "I know that it was my fault, I think about it every fucking day."

Another loud crack of thunder echoes through the flat and startles the older man.  This time the thunder sounds too much like a bomb, and John knows he isn't going to be getting anymore sleep tonight.  The blue eyed man pushes himself off the bed and sheds his sweat soaked clothing to replace them with a pair of Union Jack boxers and a white t-shirt.

John quickly goes to the door, anxious to get away from the boy he let die. "You can't run forever John." Patrick reminds as John leaves the room.

Once John is in the hall he is confronted with another face from the past, a man named Keith who he was unable to save. "I was wondering when you'd show up." The brown haired man quips.

"Fuck off." John states simply, not even stopping to take a good look at the other man.

"One day you'll join me." Keith mocks in a singsong voice.  John ignores this remark and trots down the stairs to the darkened living room. He opens the curtains to let some of the lights from the city into the room and then takes a seat on the sofa. 

John watches as the rain crashes against the window, and the beads of water roll down the glass.  Thunder crashes again and John jumps at the noise, then puts his face in his hands.  The thunder sounds too much like a bomb going off, and each time thunder cracks a long forgotten memory resurfaces.  "John?" A deep voice asks softly.

"Please leave me alone." John almost cries into his hands.  He's had it with the people he couldn't save haunting him, and now he just wants some way out of it.

"Okay, your tea is right here.  I hope you feel better by tomorrow." The all too familiar voice replies. 

When the person agrees to leave him alone John's eyes shoot open in surprise.  Sherlock stands in front of him wearing only pajama pants, with two cups of tea in his hands.  "Shit, I didn't know it was you I'm sorry." John apologizes.  He's relieved that Sherlock is here, as he is the one person who has been able to consistently help him through his troubles.

Sherlock looks over his boyfriend with a calculating gaze.  After a mere moments he knows what has happened but decides not to mention it.  "I hear you scream so I made tea.  Do you want me to stay awake with you?"

John only nods in response and pats the spot on the couch next to him.  Sherlock places John's cup in his hands before sitting down and wrapping his free arm around the shorter man to pull him into his side.  John sighs deeply and rests his head on the consulting detectives shoulder.  "I didn't mean to snap at you." John apologizes after taking a sip of tea.  "I'm sorry, I just had a bad dream."

"It's fine." Sherlock reassures while putting his drink down.  "Do you want to talk about it?"

John puts his tea on the table in front of him along with Sherlock's.  He wraps both arms around the other man's waist and buries his face in his neck.  "Nearly every night I have-"

A loud crash of thunder cuts him off and John's grip on his boyfriend tightens.  Sherlock notices this and gives his blogger a kiss on the forehead.  "You're okay, it's just a little bit of thunder.  I won't let anything happen to you." Sherlock states defensively. 

"I'm not afraid of the thunder, it just sounds too much like the bombs in Afghanistan." John explains.

"Oh." Sherlock breathes out.  He can't even begin to understand the horrors that John went through in the war, but he knows that what John needs right know is someone to keep him company.  "Why don't you come and sleep in my room?"

John's first instinct is to accept this offer and try and get a good nights rest, but he hesitates.  When they first started dating about three months ago, Mrs. Hudson nearly shat herself at the prospect of them only needing one bedroom.  This led to John and Sherlock having a serious talk about how they were going to progress with their relationship.  John had been in many relationships, but never with another man.  On the other hand, Sherlock had never been in a relationship at all.  It was completely new territory to both of them so they mutually agreed to take it slow, meaning (much to Mrs. Hudson's disappointment) they would still be needing two bedrooms. 

John pulls back to look into Sherlock's beautiful eyes, in this lighting they look dark blue in color.  "I can't." John finally admits.

Sherlock raises his eyebrows in surprise.  "Why not?"

At this John is confused.  While both of them agreed to take it slow, Sherlock was obviously the more hesitant of the two.  Now he's offering to share a bed?  "I can't because we wanted to take it slow, remember?  I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

Sherlock chuckles and shakes his head.  "John, that's ridiculous of you to think that I'm going to leave you alone when you're like this.  You are easily the most important person in my life and I love you with everything I am.  I want you to feel comfortable when you go to bed, at least for tonight.  If it's too fast then tomorrow night we can go back to the usual sleeping arrangements."

John smiles up at Sherlock and presses a soft kiss to his lips.  "I love you, Sherlock Holmes."

The other man smirks and helps John stand up.  "I love you too.  Come on, let's go to bed."

Sherlock takes John by the hand and leads him into his spacious bedroom.  For some reason it's a lot colder in here than the rest of the house and John finds himself wishing he had on something warmer.  The taller man gets into the covers and opens his arms for John to snuggle into.  Sherlock's body is warm and John wraps his arms tightly around him to try and steal some of the body heat. 

John sighs contently and smiles as he closes his eyes.  "Better?" Sherlock asks softly, not wanting to break the peaceful silence. 

"Much better." John replied truthfully. 

The thunderstorm outside continues to rage outside and it doesn't frighten John anymore.  Eventually his breathing evens out and he falls into a peaceful sleep.  Needless to say, much to Mrs. Hudson's excitement, they wouldn't be needing two bedrooms.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked it please leave a kudos or comment and I would appreciate it greatly! Have a good life and a beautiful day <3  
> Follow me on Tumblr: http://fandom-trash-aus.tumblr.com/


End file.
